The Way we see a problem is the problem

The alarm goes off! 6 AM. It was a crispy Sunday morning. As the morning rays stir the last few dews off their slumber, the pre-dawn chillness was palpable. I started my morning routine - going for a walk to the nearby park encompassing the National Hospital. The lush atmosphere with birds chirping in the trees, pigeons flocking on the grass, morning walkers strolling about as their dogs play catch-games with butterflies and yellow dandelions dancing gaily in the morning breeze – offer a tranquil mood to withdraw into the folds of nature and drown into a few sublime moments of solitude. As I sit on the park benches, I close my eyes and sink into the silent world of contemplation and reminiscence.

Today was different. I was unable to do my ‘solitude act’ due to some disturbance around. I opened my eyes, and saw a guy a few benches apart. He was sitting silently, as his two kids were bullying around – plucking the flowers, chasing pigeons, and going after the butterflies. They then picked up a fight; and were soon on the ground, pulling hairs, screaming and what not. The strollers in the park too grimaced at the kids’ act. It was all really annoying - but the guy, who seems to be their father, didn’t even react, forget control them. He was transfixed to the ground pondering over something. I was like – Dude, I’m trying to do the same, but your kids aren’t helping!! The kids had disturbed the whole serenity of the milieu. Unable to take it any longer, I walked up to the guy.

I (visibly annoyed): Look! This is a park; and there’s a hospital nearby. It would do a lot of good if you could keep your kids in check. They’re disturbing the very mood around here!

The Guy (looked up and I noticed his eyes were moist): We’re sorry. We just came out of the hospital. Their mother has passed away. I don’t know how to handle it; guess they too don’t.

I fell silent.

--

 

This story is a perfect example of the power of paradigm shift. Minutes ago, I was upset and annoyed with the kids and their father. But, suddenly, after understanding the situation, I see everything differently. Now, I’m overwhelmed with pity and compassion.

Our response to situations is based on our paradigms, our beliefs and our perspectives about them. If we could open up and see the other perspective, it would show up in a completely different light. The Way we see a problem is the problem.

- Arun KK

Story based on Stephen Covey’s 7 Habits of Highly Effective People